Thom Gibbs, Mina Rzouki and the UK's finest team of sports reporters unpack the week in football, every Monday. Join the club.
A genuinely Super Sunday on paper, but did it live up to expectations? The Telegraph's Deputy Football Correspondent Jeremy Wilson joins Thom Gibbs to unpick the weekend that was.
Spurs maintained their inverse-hoodoo at Wembley, while three 1-0 wins for away sides demonstrated that anyone can beat anyone in the middle reaches of Premier League.
Chelsea saw off Manchester United in the battle of the furious managers at Stamford Bridge. Jason Burt speaks shortly after the final whistle to discuss how Conte pulled it off, and how much United are missing Paul Pogba.
Then it's over to Manchester where James Ducker witnessed another comfortable City victory, and another limp Arsenal performance
Plus an interview with the director of the new edition of Football Manager, as Miles Jacobson gives us his top tip for avoiding the sack in the frighteningly immersive and wildly popular computer game.
Eleven games in and we've seen enough of the Premier League to make some rash conclusions about how the league table is going to pan out at its conclusion.
Chief Football Writer, Sam Wallace, joins host Thom Gibbs to give his verdict on which are the teams to believe in, who can get out of trouble, and whether anyone can realistically expect to challenge Manchester City for the title. Alan Tyers is also on hand to give a verdict on the men in the dug-out.
This is, of course, amidst the background of an international break so Luke Edwards gives us a summary of the World Cup playoffs and his views on England's 0-0 draw with Germany on Friday night.
Finally, an appearance from the very proud owner of a footballing world record as goalkeeper Paul Bastock tells Total Football about the match which clinched his new title: the footballer with the highest number of senior appearances ever.
The season has given us its first north London derby, and it was Arsenal who emerged victorious at Ashburton Grove.
The Telegraph's Chief Football Correspondent Jason Burt is our guest, and gives his verdict on that match as well as the rest of the Premier League weekend.
Is Romelu Lukaku still low on confidence despite ending his goal drought? Is Marco Silva off to Everton? And are Manchester City playing the best football ever witnessed in the Premier League?
Rob Bagchi joins to analyse the Championship and an increasingly desperate situation at Sunderland, despite the arrival of Chris Coleman. Plus Total Football welcomes Lynsey Hooper to discuss a controversial social media post from Arsenal in the wake of their victory over Spurs.
Ian Irving is keeping the host seat warm this week whilst Thom Gibbs rides the managerial merry-go-round.
Telegraph columnist Jim White joins Ian in the studio to ask if Manchester United are actually City's closest rivals to the title? Whether Arsenal have been given the push they needed from an unsuspecting source? And if Spurs are suffering from a bad case of Wembley woe?
Chris Bascombe tries to explain why Everton still haven't found a manager and decide if the current crop can claim the title of worst Everton team ever. Plus we speak with Stonewall’s Robbie De Santos to find out all about the Rainbow Laces campaign.
Did we witness the best Premier League game of the season on Saturday night? Host Thom Gibbs believes that we did, and the Telegraph's Football News Correspondent Matt Law joins us to dissect Arsenal's thrilling home defeat by Manchester United.
There's plenty of other excitement to delve into in the Premier League, including a big away win for Liverpool, more struggles for Spurs and managerial debuts for Sam Allardyce and Alan Pardew with their new clubs.
Chelsea striker Fran Kirby speaks to us about a couple of forwards who are failing to sparkle, and who will resume normal service first: Harry Kane or Romelu Lukaku.
Plus we look back on the World Cup draw with our Sports News Correspondent Ben Rumsby and ask whether it's wise or deeply, deeply stupid to expect anything whatsoever from England.
Telegraph Sport columnist Jamie Carragher joins this week's Total Football to discuss the Manchester and Merseyside derbies with host Thom Gibbs.
Hear Carragher's thoughts on his old club's 1-1 draw against an Everton team which suddenly looks very much like it is managed by Sam Allardyce.
Carragher also runs the rule over Manchester City's 2-1 victory at Old Trafford, and where that leaves the increasingly non-existent title race.
Charlie Eccleshare wraps up the rest of the Premier League, including West Ham's surprise victory over champions Chelsea, misfiring Arsenal's draw at Southampton and Tottenham's big win over Stoke.
And finally off to Europe, as we look ahead to Monday's Champions League draw with Mina Rzouki, who lets us know which teams the Premier League contenders will want to avoid in the round of 16.
Another week another frightening Manchester City victory. Telegraph Sport's Luke Edwards joins the Total Football podcast to tell Thom Gibbs just how much better this City side are than all of their rivals.
Luke and Thom pick over the bones of the Premier League weekend, taking in eye-catching wins for Crystal Palace and Huddersfield, a concerning defeat for Mark Hughes's Stoke, and Chelsea's chances of ending the season with silverware.
It's off to Merseyside where Chris Bascombe gives his verdict on Liverpool's trouncing of Bournemouth, before looking ahead to Everton vs Swansea on Monday night.
Finally, Luke gives us the latest on the Newcastle United takeover saga, and answers your questions about the latest developments.
In 2017's last Total Football, host Thom Gibbs sits down with Opta's Duncan Alexander to analyse the season so far through a statistical lens.
We look at the table from top to bottom, and put your best questions to Duncan on topics as diverse as Dixie Dean and Xabi Alonso.
Virgil van Dijk's forthcoming move to Liverpool is explained by the man who broke the story, Jeremy Wilson. And there's reaction to the appointment of Carlos Carvalhal at Swansea from broadcaster Michelle Owen.
With sheer weight of football threatening to overwhelm us over the festive period you would be forgiven for feeling mildly confused.
Fortunately the Total Football podcast is back to help you navigate the 600 or so games which seem to have taken place since Christmas.
The Telegraph's Chief Football Writer Sam Wallace joins Thom Gibbs to give his views on who has come out on top since Boxing Day, as well as the latest on Jose Mourinho's contract situation at Manchester United and some transfer window chat, because it is January after all.
Former Premier League referee Keith Hackett joins to discuss the effect of fixture pile-up can have on the people officiating the games.
Finally Chris Bascombe looks ahead to Friday night's Merseyside derby in the FA Cup, and a possible debut for Virgil van Dijk.
The FA Cup third round looked to be heading for a 6/10 overall rating until Nottingham Forest knocked out the holders in a classic at the City Ground.
Broadcaster Kait Borsay joins Total Football host Thom Gibbs to analyse the generous slate of weekend games including Mark Hughes's final indignity in charge of Stoke City.
Jason Burt speaks to the podcast about his exclusive on Philippe Coutinho's sale to Barcelona, pondering how Jurgen Klopp might spend the money and how Coutinho will fit in at the Spanish league leaders.
Finally injury data analyst Ben Dinnery joins to give us his expert opinion on which Premier League clubs are best at managing their players to avoid injuries, and what's really to blame for hamstring-related sadness at this time of year.